Conflict Management and Leadership Skills


A conflict is a disagreement between two parties of different levels that may be a threat to their existence. Conflicts occur when the parties realize the disagreement will be a threat to their interests, needs, and concerns.

Although conflicts are part of us in society and provide opportunities for growth when we understand them, they are viewed to have negative impacts on our lives.

In this essay, I intend to explore the methods used to solve conflicts, and the leadership skills we can apply in our businesses and find similarities by comparing these skills of leadership with those of a grown-up child.


It was in the year 2003 when I had a disagreement with my closest friend at school during the music festival season. She was the patron of the drama club in our school. I really wanted to go to the festivals though I was not a member of the club. My plan was to pretend that I was participating in the choral verse, but in a real sense, I was not. I talked with my friend Olive, and she accepted.

During rehearsals, I was very active so that no one could notice my plan. I recited the poems as the rest did to convince the music teacher that I was a member of the music club. The time finally came for the competitions, and names were to be submitted to the headmistress for perusal.

We lined up, as usual, waiting for our names to be read out so that we could board the school bus to the venue for the music festivals. All my friends had their names called out, except mine. I was embarrassed with myself because my plan had aborted at the last minute.

At the same time, I felt betrayed by my friend who knew about my plan all along and had instead decided that I should not attend the music festivals. I knew Olive deleted my name from the final list because my excuse for going was not sincere.

Since that day, our friendship was not the same again. I developed hatred for her, and our friendship slowly faded away. Almost everyone in school, including the school counselor and some of the members of both the teaching and non-teaching staff, noticed that we were no longer friends, and they were all concerned.

Methods used to solve the conflict

The process involved our class monitor, class teacher, school counselor, and some of my classmates. We met at the boardroom, and the counselor acted as the mediator. She made us sit together with my friend, and we explained what happened.

It was difficult for me to forgive my friend, but because she accepted her mistake, we reconciled, and I forgave her. The counselor told us to hug each other as a sign of accepting forgiveness. The crowd was happy because it was a successful conflict resolution process, and I was happy; our friendship was back to normal.

Lessons learn

This particular event taught me that we need to own up to our mistakes and learn from them. In addition, I also learned the importance of forgiving those who wrong us and forgetting those incidents. This is an important step towards healing because if you do not forgive, hate will conquer your heart, resulting in more conflicts in the future.

Future learning objectives

In the future, we should control our anger to avoid harm. Respect is important in friendship because it enhances harmony and unity among people, and reduces the risk of conflicts in society. We should learn to appreciate our friends and understand them the way they are born: their attitudes mind their feelings and character traits.

How beliefs have influenced my behavior and perception in potential leadership situations

Beliefs have influenced my behavior and perceptions regarding leadership positions. Initially, I thought that men are recommended to be leaders more than women because they are known to be courageous.

However, I have now learned that even women can be effective leaders just like their male counterparts, as evidenced by the increasing number of women in leadership positions among various organizations.

Effective leadership may be cultivated by motivating workers by giving them rewards, fringe benefits, giving them freedom of expression, and having a unified workforce can help accompany track each employee’s progress.

Having the employees’ information helps the managers to know their skills development and performance levels in the organization.


When one wants to develop the best and brightest workers, it is important to consider the group effort, and it must be of both employers and employees.

Everyone should participate in the decision-making process and implement talent management solutions. This will motivate workers to work harder and increase the productivity of the organization.

Lessons learned

Employers should be good examples to their employees and be good leaders so that they will succeed. They should be free with them so that they can enjoy their work in an ideal environment without fear. The employees, in turn, should be given security by the organization in terms of protective clothing and life, health insurance.

Future learning objectives

To discourage individualization on an organization because it causes isolation amongst the workers that will slow down the productivity in the organization because there is togetherness.

Leadership skills that we can bring to the business leadership table

Hackman and Oldham (1975, p. 161) found out that there are a variety of methods for improving job enrichment. Leaders should be examples to their employees; they should identify different tasks to be performed, and they require a variety of skills.

This enables the workers to learn different skills from those that they have. Leaders should control employees to enhance order at the workplace. They should inform workers about their performance; how well they are performing, and this will lead to competition amongst them.


Employers need to enrich the jobs of their employees by giving or adding them motivators. This will give them the morale to perform their duties though it needs more control and supervision because of the needs of the employee increase.

Cunningham and Eberle (1990, p. 56) stated that when redesigning jobs, leaders have to enlarge and enrich them. This can be done by adding a variety of tasks and duties to the job so that it will not bore the workers and providing motivators to them.

Lessons learned

There are similarities that we should expect, and they include managers should act as examples to their employees, and they should be in control. Leaders should be getting information and giving information. They should know what is happening in the organization.

Future learning objectives

  • To offer leadership skills to leaders so that they can be effective leaders.
  • To teach managers how to improve employees’ self-esteem.
  • Provide managers with new leadership skills.


People view things differently because we come from different backgrounds. There are those among us who follow their folks, and we have had unique experiences in life, cultural differences, and different upbringing. For example, when solving disputes in society, elders should be the first people to be informed about it. They should also be in charge of giving punishments to offenders.

Others will argue that offenders should be taken to court instead of letting elders resolve the conflict. Some societies are strict with their culture, while others are not. These differences can, therefore, be used as guidelines to solve conflicts in our different societies and later check the best option instead of punishing someone because of a minor offense.

Lessons learned

People react differently to things, and this is because we are all from different backgrounds, we have grown up in the different cultural and environmental background. We should, therefore, respect other people’s ideas.

Future learning objectives

To respect the fact that we are unique and appreciate our different perceptions.

Reference List

Cunningham, J.B. & Eberle, T., 1990,. A guide to Job Environment and Redesign. Personnel, Vol. 67, No. 2, pp. 56.

Hackman, J.R. & Oldham, G.R. (1975). Development of the Job Diagnostic Survey. Journal of Applied Psychology, Vol. 60, pp. 159-170.

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